Dreams

I am back in das boot and it is as unattractive now as it was a year ago and as uncomfortable. I get to wear jeans to work though because I can't fit any of my pants over the boot. That's a good thing. I am a jeans woman, jeans and flip-flops and long-sleeved white t-shirts. That is my idea of style! My foot is beginning to feel a little better, but I fear I am in for more "rest" than I would care for. I am back to my old habits. I come home from work, eat a bit, then go to sleep. In my flawed logic if I can't be outside doing what I love, then I will just sleep.

I have always been a big sleeper, have always taken lots of naps. Sleep is very restorative for me. No one in my family or circle of friends understands it. They see it as missing out on life. I see it as recharging my batteries and having a little time where I don't have to think so much. My mind can be my enemy sometimes as it is very hard for me to turn it off. Don't get me wrong, I love to think, but sometimes I need a break. Watching tv can be a good distraction, but I'd rather sleep than watch what is on tv now (except for my dear Law & Order). I believe that when I sleep all my thoughts get sorted out and become clearer because usually when I wake up I can think so much better than I could before.

I am trying to meditate more, but I find this to be extremely difficult. My thoughts constantly wander off in the wrong direction. For example, if I'm trying to focus on my breathing I'll start thinking about whether or not I left the lights on in the car or I'll star thinking about all the books I want to read. Get the point? Even as I write this I am thinking about how I can best describe my relationship with music. I will keep trying though.

Music is like the Pied Piper to me--when I hear something I like I am drawn to it like a moth to a flame. I have a very visceral response to music. A song can give me so much energy I feel like I'm about to explode! Or a song can make me extremely contemplative and drive me to write for hours on end. I like to listen to my favorite classical music alone--I can process it better that way--like Durufle, Elgar, Chopin, or the Ahn Trio. The Indigo Girls always energize me as does U2. Pinback and Gomez make me contemplative.

This is quite the miscellaneous post. I've gone from das boot to Gomez--what a trip! Random thoughts in a random pattern? (I've been called "random" before--but that's just my brother talking about my innate ability to tell stories with no point whatsoever!) I've finished my coffee and have chewed about 4 pieces of nicorette, now what? If it were up to me I would take off on a plane to London and take a flat for about 2 weeks and go visit all the places my favorite writers visited, the cafes, the parks. Maybe meet some dashing English man and have tea. Ah, dreams!